Retirement Rut

The alarm clock is gone. The commute is a distant memory. And the days now follow a very precise rhythm — early bird special at 4:30pm, TV dinner by 6, and the faint, comforting waft of mothballs drifting through a living room that hasn't changed since 1987.

Retirement Rut is a warmly affectionate tribute to the golden years — the shuffleboard sweat, the TV dinner steam, and the particular cosiness of a life lived entirely on your own schedule.

Light it for the retiree in your life. They've earned it.

Scent profile: Mothballs · TV dinner steam · Shuffleboard sweat

Tagline: "Endless early bird."

• Also known as Golden Years Gunk — because accuracy is everything
• The perfect retirement party gift or cheeky send-off present
• Hand-poured by Stinkwicks — celebrating every stage of life, however pungent

Warning: may cause the sudden urge to eat dinner at 4:30pm, complain about the volume on the telly, and fall asleep in a very comfortable chair.